paco que llega a su casa y desde abajo le crita a su muje maria,que voy pa arriba y te voy echa 4 polvo,maria le crita pa tra,paco otra ve ta boracho.y el le dice no que vengo con 4 amigos.lol
Husband Down
A husband and wife are shopping in their local ASDA
The husband picks up a case of Tennants and puts it in their trolley.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.
'They're on sale, only 10 for 24 cans he replies.
'Put them back, we can't afford them' demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.
A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a 20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.
'Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.
Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Tennants and it's half the price.'
He never knew what hit him.
One day, in line at the works cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him, 'My elbow hurts like hell. I suppose I'd better see a doctor!'
Listen mate; don't waste your time down at the surgery, Mike replies.
There's a diagnostic computer at Tesco. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong, and what to do about it.
It takes ten seconds and only costs five quid....a lot quicker and better than a doctor and you get Clubcard points'.
So Jack collects a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Tesco. He deposits five pounds and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: 'You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks'.
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and 'pleasured himself' into the mixture for good measure. Jack hurried back to Tesco, eager to check what would happen.
He deposits five pounds, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results with a grin. The computer prints the following:
1) Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
2) Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3) Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4) Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5) And if you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better....
Thank you for shopping at Tesco ...... every little helps
Alfred Balban
Jul 12, 2011
gino guilliano
Jul 19, 2011
Adam Karp
A husband and wife are shopping in their local ASDA
The husband picks up a case of Tennants and puts it in their trolley.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.
'They're on sale, only 10 for 24 cans he replies.
'Put them back, we can't afford them' demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.
A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a 20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.
'Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.
Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Tennants and it's half the price.'
He never knew what hit him.
Jul 21, 2011
Alfred Balban
One day, in line at the works cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him,
'My elbow hurts like hell. I suppose I'd better see a doctor!'
Listen mate; don't waste your time down at the surgery, Mike replies.
There's a diagnostic computer at Tesco. Just give it a urine sample
and the computer will tell you what's wrong, and what to do about it.
It takes ten seconds and only costs five quid....a lot quicker and
better than a doctor and you get Clubcard points'.
So Jack collects a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Tesco.
He deposits five pounds and the computer lights up and asks for the
urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:
'You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy
activity. It will improve in two weeks'.
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples
from his wife and daughter, and 'pleasured himself' into the mixture for good measure. Jack hurried back to Tesco, eager to check what would
happen.
He deposits five pounds, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results with a grin. The computer prints the following:
1) Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
2) Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3) Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4) Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5) And if you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never
get better....
Thank you for shopping at Tesco ...... every little helps
Aug 14, 2011
Alfred Balban
Coversation between Spanish military and the American Fleet.
Sep 29, 2011
gino guilliano
that was a good one alfred lol,they should bring one of those machines to morrisons.lollol
Sep 29, 2011
Marocatlasgib4x4 Club
Feb 4, 2012
Louis Balban
This really happened in Ireland .
There is no fix for being Irish... .......
My day looks pretty good after seeing this
I could have sworn I hit the brake pedal!
Car upside down in the bay - see the guy standing on it?
Call out the Crane Truck!
Coming back up...coming...coming
Ooops! Jaayze. Would you look at your man dere!
Coming...almost there!
Mar 31, 2012
Louis Balban
you got to watch this ....jajajaja funny guide
May 7, 2012
Alfred Balban
That was a good one,the guid sure got his head STONED,jajaja!
May 7, 2012
Alfred Balban
Nov 15, 2012
Marocatlasgib4x4 Club
Check out the best joke of 2012,sorry its in spanish for some but you could always use your translator accelerator to read it ;-)
Jan 18, 2013